It’s been sold on infomercials. It’s been referred to in movies and TV shows. It’s the FLOWBEE — the home haircutting system that attaches to a vacuum cleaner. I thought it would behoover me to investigate further…
Dear FLOWBEE Hair Vacuum Stylists:
I’m trying to uncover the answer to Shakespeare’s most famous question: To FLOWBEE or not to FLOWBEE.
From what I understand, the FLOWBEE Vacuum Haircut System attaches to a household vacuum cleaner, which provides suction power to draw hair into recessed blades for a refreshing vacuum haircut. That’s a pretty hair-brained idea, but I’m willing to hair you out for the moment.
To be honest, I don’t have a full head of flowing hair anymore. So, if I got a FLOWBEE, would I still need the full power of a standard vacuum cleaner, or could I get a nice precise trim with a Dustbuster?
You claim the FLOWBEE allows people to create the most popular hairstyles. What countries are these styles popular in? Are any celebrities FLOWBEEING their hair? I’m not real handy, so are there any FLOWBEE hair cutting salons or vacuum cleaner shops you can recommend that offer the latest in FLOWBEE styling? I’m concerned if I make a fatal FLOWBEE error that my dome will end up having an open roof, and who wants to look like the Astrodome from overhead?
Finally, is there any chance the FLOWBEE could backfire and cause all the vacuum bag dust to shoot out on my head? I’m highly allergic to house dust and would hate to catch asthma from a FLOWBEE-related freak accident.
Your answers will help me decide whether to suck it up and try a FLOWBEE. I have nothing to lose but the rest of my hair, right?
A Customer Service Representative from FLOWBEE International responded with:
To answer your first question concerning the power of the vacuum, the more vacuum power the better regardless of hair amount. We recommend a minimum of 3HP or 8 AMPS.
The Flowbee cuts layered, just as scissors would cut when held straight out or pulled up and cut. This is the most basic cut that is most popular in most countries. A typical man’s cut for a better analogy.
There are no Flowbee haircutting salons to our knowledge. Your system will include a very detailed user’s guide that we strongly recommend reading prior to your Flowbee use. There is also a DVD available that offers a few tips.
In my eight years with Flowbee I have never heard of a Flowbee causing a vacuum to backfire.
You may order online at www.flowbee.com or call 1-800-728-2887. Thank you for your interest in Flowbee.
Final Thoughts: Even if you don’t enjoy vacuuming, you may still find that new hairstyle you’re looking for with the FLOWBEE. Plus, if you’re wearing a rug, it could be especially effective. Either way, when you’re confronted with any decision that makes your hair stand up, you can always Write The Company.
