A loyal Write The Company fan and Twitter follower, @DanREvans, sent a suggestion for a letter to Dunkin’ Donuts. They didn’t reply to my first inquiry about the things that bugged Dan, which bugged me, so I bugged them again to respond…

Dear Dough Nuts that also Serve Good Coffee:

My first question is: What does Customer Service do all day? Apparently, you’re not paying attention to all your customers because by not answering my letter, you’ve actually been ignoring two customers. I figure since I keep eating your donuts and the other guy keeps drinking your coffee that the least you could do is serve up a response. So, I’m resending my inquiry and here’s what we’d still like to know…

My buddy Dan has two Dunkin’ Donuts dilemmas. Can you please provide sound rationales, or even some plausible propaganda, to help Dan fully understand why you are torturing him to this extent?

Dilemma 1: How come the price of Dunkin’ Donuts iced coffee is more expensive than the cost of hot coffee? That makes no sense — it’s all coffee! Why would the temperature of coffee determine the cost? Based on your iced-costs-more-than-hot philosophy, that would mean you could charge more for donuts when they come out hot. But you don’t. Why? Because it would be ludicrous — just like it is to charge more for iced coffee! Every time Dan orders a combo, your various stores charge up to 40 cents more to trade out the hot medium coffee for a medium iced coffee. How do your pricing experts explain this?

Dilemma 2: Another problem is that you don’t offer any non-fat creamer. Dan tells me that Half & Half can add up to 200 extra calories. And that can be 10% of a person’s caloric intake for an entire day. Holy cow! If a person drinks Dunkin’ Donuts coffees throughout the day, every day, it won’t be long before they start looking like a cow! Can’t you take some of the money you’re siphoning from iced coffee customers to provide a non-fat creamer option?

I know America Runs on Dunkin’, but what’s with the people running Dunkin’? Are they all just pro-fat and anti-iced? Is there anything you can share before Dan flies off again in a Dunkin’ stupor?

A Customer Relations Associate responded with:

Thank you for taking the time to contact Dunkin’ Donuts. We always appreciate hearing from our customers. Our iced coffee is typically priced higher than hot coffee is because to ensure the iced coffee has our full delicious flavor, it is double brewed.

I will forward your feedback regarding non fat creamer to our product team. It’s important to us to get feedback both good and bad about our products and the service you receive at our shops. We will make sure your comments get heard and shared with the appropriate people.

At Dunkin’ Donuts we value our customers and are committed to making your visits to our stores a pleasant experience. Please accept the enclosed gift as a gesture of our sincere appreciation for your comments.

Thank you again for contacting us and have a great day.

Final Thoughts: In the end, Dunkin’ Donuts did deliver and address Dan’s issues. Iced coffee costs more because it’s double brewed. Doing things twice is more expensive, which is why it cost me double postage and time to send out two letters.

A 2008 Dunkin’ Donuts press release elaborated on double brewing iced coffee by stating, “The unique process, called double brewing, uses twice the amount of coffee when making the beverage to achieve consistent flavor and freshness that are never compromised at the expense of serving it cold.” This makes for an interesting double standard when it comes to coffee.

The Customer Relations Associate also seemed sincere about passing on the non fat creamer request. Why not offer it? There are already enough fat and fat calories to go around for everyone in the donuts!

Included with the response was a $5.00 Dunkin’ Donuts gift card. I’m going to offer it to Dan who inspired this letter. Now, no one can ever say that I don’t give a Dan. Dunkin’ certainly did, which was very thoughtful.

Next time you crave hot or iced coffee and donuts, look for Dunkin’ Donuts. Finally, when you need answers about what’s brewing behind the scenes of a brand, after your morning coffee you can always Write The Company.