Write The Company

There’s no question that chips and dip belong with each other. In an attempt to bring them even closer together, I proposed this idea to the makers of Kettle Potato Chips…
Dear Ma & Pa Kettle:
It is mind-boggling how many tantalizing chip flavors you’ve created — Jalapeno, Sweet Onion, Death Valley Chipotle, Backyard Barbeque, Sour Cream [...]

The first Twinkie was created in 1930 and the rest is history. Since I generally got a “C” in History, I started with Clinton and worked my way to the Cream filling in this letter to the Chefs behind Twinkies…
Dear Twinkie Bakers:
I read that former President Clinton put a Twinkie in a time capsule back [...]

There’s one drawback to eating Cheetos Puffs that concerns me. I reached out to Frito-Lay, the manufacturers, to see if there’s a solution…
Dear Cheese Puffers:
I’ve been a big Cheetos Cheese Puffs nibbler for years. Because I eat so many of them, my fingers turn yellowy-orange and I’m wondering if people think I have jaundice. Is [...]

Anyone can make ice. Yet there’s one nationality whose ice is much tastier than all the rest — Italian Ice. What makes the recipe for Italian Ice unique? That’s what I wanted to know, so I asked Luigi’s Real Italian Ice…
Dear Italian Ice Makers,
I just got back from Italy and didn’t see anyone selling Italian [...]

After opening a bag of Cape Cod Potato Chips, I laid all my chips down on the table. That led to this letter…
Dear Chipsters:
There’s no denying your chips are tasty. But how come you use such big bags when you only fill the chips up about halfway? I know that settling may occur, but there’s [...]

Where can you turn when you need a Kiss and your lover isn’t around? I hit on Hershey’s because they’ve planted more Kisses in peoples’ mouths than anyone…
Dear Kiss Initiators:

No question about it, your Kisses are addicting. They’ve always kept me craving for more. You get a Kiss just where you want it, right in [...]

There are many varieties of bubble gum. But how many create lasting memories? These days, most don’t even create lasting flavor. Bazooka is one bubble gum I still fondly remember from my childhood. Those little individual pieces wrapped with a Bazooka Joe Comic had an incredibly addictive taste, smell and bubble blowing power. After all [...]

An unemployed friend looking to reinvent himself asked me to suggest some new career directions. The exercise helped me come up with a sweet moonlighting idea for myself at Ferrara Pan Candy Company…
Dear Sweet Tooth Fairies,

You make the most mouthwatering candies ever created — Atomic FireBalls, Red Hots, The Original Jaw Breakers – Jaw Busters, [...]